Daily Disorders for Doomsday

                                      (MONDAY, 10th FEBRUARY, 1947.)

Routine.  A few minutes late at 0400 and getting later.

O.O.D                                 Gone ashore.                   Duty G.I.          Gone with the wind.
Mid of Watch .                Gone for a drink.           Duty T.I.           Gone to Earth.
Duty E.O.                        Gone up in smoke.         Duty N.C.O.     Gone to the...
Duty Med. Officer .        Gone sick.                         Duty P.O.          Gone to lunch.

                                    Dress No. 16's, negative goloshes.

                                   Thought for the Day:  "Bash onRegardless."

0300             Belay the last pipe.
0310             Petty Officers and Sergeants of Messes for tea.
0315             Call the hands.
0330             Hands turn out (if they feel like it).
0340             Hands turn up.
0341             Hands turn to.
0345             Hands fall out.
0615             Open bathrooms. Close interceptors. Call the roll. Pay the rent. Belay the last pipe.
0745             Messdeck and Flat Sweepers fall in on the Quarterdeck with kit lockers.
0830             Open fire (one round of practice shell is to be shared between all turrets).
(about)    
0839             Secure. Hands shift into No. 17's negative halberds.
0840             Guard of Honour and Band get fell in on Starboard side of the Quarterdeck.
0845             Ship open to visitors.
0859             Entry of Trumpeters and Police.
0900             Entry of King Neptune, Queen Amphitrite and Court. The Commander will greet                                    them and they will inspect the Guard.
0910             Court will proceed up Port side, around "A" Turret, to platform.
(about) 
0925½          Address of welcome by Captain.
0928½          Reply by King Neptune.
093I¾          Presentation of Honours and Awards.
0945                Initiation of Novices.
0946                Heaven knows what.
1200                The Court will rise.
1345              PipeClocks will be advanced 41 minutes at 1649 this evening. Last Dogwatchmen will                             relieve at 1732½ old time. The time is now 1216½ new time. Start the watches. Fall                             out the Band.
1602             Both Watches of the Hands fall in in the Keyboard Flat. Stand fast men closed up or                               fed up.
1700              Up Spirits.
17OO¼         Down Spirits.
1900              Hands shift into Fancy Dressnegative sombreros,
1930              Cinema show for ship's company in Forecastle Locker.
2000              Rounds.
2050              Rounds again.
2200              Wipe down.
2230              Pipe down.
2231             All mermaids to be waterborne by this time.


                                                                                      NOTES.

1.          Dress for Crossing the Line. ---  Wear your best suit and shoes. They are bound to be ruined, and the slop room can sell                                 you  new ones.
2.          Stamp ---  Make certain you have Neptune's stamp on your body somewhere before leaving the bath. It's the only proof                                 you've  been initiated, and the second time is worse than the first.
3.          Auxilliary Police ---  Once you have Neptune's stamp on you, you become automatically an auxiliary policeman, and it is                                your duty to bring for initiation anyone you know to be skulking.
4.          Bath----The bath should be rather treacly by noon. Get there flrst for a nice clean shave and wash.
5.          Main Idea----A good day's fun and merriment for all.


                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 DOLPHINIUS,

                                                                                                        Clerk to His Most Oceanic                                                                                                                                           Majesty King Neptune.